Oh yeah.
This guy.
I know what you might be saying. "Rick, how is Samuel L. Jackson, a man who wears a BERET, a threat to international peace". And I respond with:
Guy's got a FLAMETHROWER. Oh, sure, you may say, "that's not that intimidating, why not just let him be." Because, if you let Sam Jackson survive into the future, you get THIS:
That's right. The legendary pimp-saber. Sam Jackson's force is bright purple.
They say that you should know your enemy. Fine. Let's get to know Sam Jackson.
Born in 1948, Sam Jackson was the child Tennessee just couldn't handle. He took the English language by storm, developing a terrible stammer. This bothered Sammy J. immensely. According to this interview in the Independent, Mr. Jackson explained,
This would haunt him until his speech therapist recommended he participate in public speaking classes to break him of the habit. It was said that the speeches he made would rattle the foundations of the buildings he spoke in and force all snakes within 5 miles to die, instantly.
Later in life, he became involved in the Civil Rights Movement. But then he got into a little fight with the FBI and his mom got scared, said he's moving to be an actor in LA.
During this time, L. Jacks developed a cocaine addiction. This culminated in an overdose, which lead to him being put into a New York rehab center. He came barreling back in Spike Lee's Jungle Fever where he played a cocaine addict. Huh.
What really shot him into stardom were his roles in Pulp Fiction, Die Hard and the Star Wars series. Apparently, The legendary purple lightsaber was a suggestion by S.J. to George Lucas, claiming that it would "look cool". Later, in an MTV interview he boasted that he "got the only purple lightsaber in the universe and I hope I get to take it home with me after they kill me." The brilliant bastard.
The reason I really wanted to write this entry was because of a little-known movie called Snakes on a Plane
Sure, it was lame. The plot was contrived and the characters were flatter than my ex-wife ah ha ha ha. But, let's get some history here. Mr. Leroy Jackson agreed to work on this movie based soley on the fact that it was being directed by a director he liked from Hong Kong and the mudda-fuggin NAME. He didn't even read the script. Badasses don't read.
Not badass enough? How about the fact that he single-handedly made them keep the name Snakes on a Plane even though New Line attempted to make the name less of...I don't know...Noun on a completely unrelated noun.
Not enough? How about the fact that he made the studio RESHOOT parts of the movie, turning it from PG-13 to R SIMPLY BECAUSE he wanted to say the line "I've had enough of these mother*%*&ing snakes on this mother*$&#ing plane!"
That's right. Samuel L. Jackson happens to be the single most badass person in recorded history.
Well...
With the exception of George Washington. Man had balls.
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